Mark Chapter 2
So, he rolled back into Capernaum after a minute, and everyone was like, "Yo, he's back at the spot!"
And again he entered into Capernaum after {some} days; and it was noised that he was in the house.
Immediately, a whole crew showed up, so packed there was barely space, not even by the door, and he was dropping the vibes to them.
And straightway many were gathered together, insomuch that there was no room to receive {them}, no, not so much as about the door: and he preached the word unto them.
They came through with a dude who was ill, carried by four of his homies.
And they come unto him, bringing one sick of the palsy, which was borne of four.
When they couldn't get close since it was too packed, they seriously went all out and pulled back the roof where he was, then lowered the bed down with the sick dude on it.
And when they could not come nigh unto him for the press, they uncovered the roof where he was: and when they had broken {it} up, they let down the bed wherein the sick of the palsy lay.
Jesus peeped their faith and said to the sick dude, "Bro, your sins are forgiven, no cap."
When Jesus saw their faith, he said unto the sick of the palsy, Son, thy sins be forgiven thee.
But some scribes were just chilling there, thinking sus thoughts in their minds.
But there were certain of the scribes sitting there, and reasoning in their hearts,
They were like, "Why's this dude talking smack? Only God can forgive sins, fr."
Why doth this {man} thus speak blasphemies? who can forgive sins but God only?
As soon as Jesus caught the vibe of what they were thinking, he said, "Why y'all trippin' in your hearts?"
And immediately when Jesus perceived in his spirit that they so reasoned within themselves, he said unto them, Why reason ye these things in your hearts?
Like, what's easier to say to the sick dude? "Your sins are forgiven," or "Get up, grab your bed, and bounce?"
Whether is it easier to say to the sick of the palsy, {Thy} sins be forgiven thee; or to say, Arise, and take up thy bed, and walk?
But so you know the Son of Man has the rizz to forgive sins on earth, he told the sick guy,
But that ye may know that the Son of man hath power on earth to forgive sins, (he saith to the sick of the palsy,)
"Yo, get up, take your bed, and bounce back to your spot."
I say unto thee, Arise, and take up thy bed, and go thy way into thine house.
Dude jumped up, grabbed his bed, and rolled out in front of everyone; they were shook and praised God, saying, "We’ve never seen anything like this!"
And immediately he arose, took up the bed, and went forth before them all; insomuch that they were all amazed, and glorified God, saying, We never saw it on this fashion.
He hit the beach again, and all the peeps flocked to him, and he dropped some knowledge on them.
And he went forth again by the sea side; and all the multitude resorted unto him, and he taught them.
As he was passing by, he peeped Levi chilling at the tax booth and said, "Follow me." Levi got up and dipped with him.
And as he passed by, he saw Levi the {son} of Alphaeus sitting at the receipt of custom, and said unto him, Follow me. And he arose and followed him. {at the...: or, at the place where the custom was received}
While Jesus was chilling at dinner in his crib, a bunch of tax collectors and sinners were vibing with him and his crew; there were a ton of them, and they were all about that life.
And it came to pass, that, as Jesus sat at meat in his house, many publicans and sinners sat also together with Jesus and his disciples: for there were many, and they followed him.
When the scribes and Pharisees saw him eating with tax collectors and sinners, they asked his crew, "How can he eat and drink with these people?"
And when the scribes and Pharisees saw him eat with publicans and sinners, they said unto his disciples, How is it that he eateth and drinketh with publicans and sinners?
Jesus caught wind of it and said, "Healthy folks don’t need a doctor, but the sick do. I didn’t come to call the righteous, but the sinners to level up."
When Jesus heard {it}, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.
John’s squad and the Pharisees used to fast, and they came to him asking, "Why don’t your crew fast?"
And the disciples of John and of the Pharisees used to fast: and they come and say unto him, Why do the disciples of John and of the Pharisees fast, but thy disciples fast not?
Jesus was like, "Can the wedding guests fast when the bridegroom is right there? As long as he’s with them, they can’t fast."
And Jesus said unto them, Can the children of the bridechamber fast, while the bridegroom is with them? as long as they have the bridegroom with them, they cannot fast.
But the time will come when the bridegroom gets taken away, and then they’ll be fasting for real.
But the days will come, when the bridegroom shall be taken away from them, and then shall they fast in those days.
No cap, you can't stitch new threads on old fits; otherwise, the new patch just messes up the vibe even more.
No man also seweth a piece of new cloth on an old garment: else the new piece that filled it up taketh away from the old, and the rent is made worse. {new cloth: or, raw, or, unwrought cloth}
And for real, you can’t pour new juice into old bottles; it’ll just spill everywhere and wreck the bottles. New juice needs fresh bottles, periodt.
And no man putteth new wine into old bottles: else the new wine doth burst the bottles, and the wine is spilled, and the bottles will be marred: but new wine must be put into new bottles. {bottles: or, sacks of skin}
So, he was vibing through the cornfields on the chill day; and his crew started grabbing some corn as they walked.
And it came to pass, that he went through the corn fields on the sabbath day; and his disciples began, as they went, to pluck the ears of corn.
The Pharisees were like, "Yo, why are they breaking the rules on the chill day?"
And the Pharisees said unto him, Behold, why do they on the sabbath day that which is not lawful?
He was like, "Did you even peep what David did when he was starving with his squad?"
And he said unto them, Have ye never read what David did, when he had need, and was an hungred, he, and they that were with him?
How he rolled into God’s crib during Abiathar’s time and snagged the showbread, which is only meant for the priests, and shared it with his crew?
How he went into the house of God in the days of Abiathar the high priest, and did eat the shewbread, which is not lawful to eat but for the priests, and gave also to them which were with him?
He said, "The chill day was made for humans, not the other way around."
And he said unto them, The sabbath was made for man, and not man for the sabbath:
So, the Son of Man is also the boss of the chill day.
Therefore the Son of man is Lord also of the sabbath.