Luke Chapter 5
So it was lit that a crowd was all up in his biz to hear the word of God, and he was chilling by the Gennesaret lake, no cap.
And it came to pass, that, as the people pressed upon him to hear the word of God, he stood by the lake of Gennesaret,
He spotted two boats just lounging by the lake, but the fishermen were AWOL, busy cleaning their nets.
And saw two ships standing by the lake: but the fishermen were gone out of them, and were washing {their} nets.
So he jumped into one of the boats, Simon’s ride, and told him to push out a bit from the shore. He sat down and dropped some wisdom to the crowd from the boat.
And he entered into one of the ships, which was Simon's, and prayed him that he would thrust out a little from the land. And he sat down, and taught the people out of the ship.
Once he wrapped up his talk, he told Simon, "Ayo, let’s head out to the deep and cast your nets for a catch."
Now when he had left speaking, he said unto Simon, Launch out into the deep, and let down your nets for a draught.
Simon shot back, "Master, we’ve been grinding all night and caught zip, but bet, I’ll drop the net 'cause you said it."
And Simon answering said unto him, Master, we have toiled all the night, and have taken nothing: nevertheless at thy word I will let down the net.
When they did that, they hooked a boatload of fish, like, their net was practically ripping apart.
And when they had this done, they inclosed a great multitude of fishes: and their net brake.
They hollered for their homies in the other boat to come through, and when they did, both boats were so packed they started to sink, fr.
And they beckoned unto {their} partners, which were in the other ship, that they should come and help them. And they came, and filled both the ships, so that they began to sink.
When Simon Peter peeped the madness, he dropped to his knees in front of Jesus, saying, "Yo, just bounce; I’m a flawed dude, Lord."
When Simon Peter saw {it}, he fell down at Jesus' knees, saying, Depart from me; for I am a sinful man, O Lord.
He was totally shook, and everyone with him was amazed by the insane catch of fish they pulled in.
For he was astonished, and all that were with him, at the draught of the fishes which they had taken:
James and John, the sons of Zebedee, who rolled with Simon, were also hyped about it. Jesus told Simon, "Chill, from now on you’ll be catching people."
And so {was} also James, and John, the sons of Zebedee, which were partners with Simon. And Jesus said unto Simon, Fear not; from henceforth thou shalt catch men.
They brought their boats to shore, ditched everything, and followed him. No cap.
And when they had brought their ships to land, they forsook all, and followed him.
One time, in a city, a dude with leprosy noticed Jesus, dropped to his face, and was like, "Lord, if you want, you can make me clean."
And it came to pass, when he was in a certain city, behold a man full of leprosy: who seeing Jesus fell on {his} face, and besought him, saying, Lord, if thou wilt, thou canst make me clean.
Jesus reached out, touched him, and said, "I got you, be clean." And just like that, the leprosy vanished.
And he put forth {his} hand, and touched him, saying, I will: be thou clean. And immediately the leprosy departed from him.
He told him to keep it low-key, but go show yourself to the priest and offer for your cleansing like Moses said, for the vibes.
And he charged him to tell no man: but go, and shew thyself to the priest, and offer for thy cleansing, according as Moses commanded, for a testimony unto them.
But the news spread like fire about him, and crowds rolled up to hear and get healed. It was bussin'.
But so much the more went there a fame abroad of him: and great multitudes came together to hear, and to be healed by him of their infirmities.
He bounced into the wilderness to pray, just vibing solo.
And he withdrew himself into the wilderness, and prayed.
One day while he was teaching, Pharisees and law experts from all over were chilling there, and the Lord's power was on deck to heal.
And it came to pass on a certain day, as he was teaching, that there were Pharisees and doctors of the law sitting by, which were come out of every town of Galilee, and Judaea, and Jerusalem: and the power of the Lord was {present} to heal them.
Then, some dudes brought a paralyzed guy on a bed, trying to get him in to see Jesus.
And, behold, men brought in a bed a man which was taken with a palsy: and they sought {means} to bring him in, and to lay {him} before him.
When they couldn't find a way in due to the crowd, they climbed up to the roof and lowered him down through the tiles right in front of Jesus.
And when they could not find by what {way} they might bring him in because of the multitude, they went upon the housetop, and let him down through the tiling with {his} couch into the midst before Jesus.
When Jesus saw their faith, he said, "Yo, your sins are forgiven."
And when he saw their faith, he said unto him, Man, thy sins are forgiven thee.
The scribes and Pharisees were like, "Who’s this dude throwing shade? Only God can forgive sins, fr."
And the scribes and the Pharisees began to reason, saying, Who is this which speaketh blasphemies? Who can forgive sins, but God alone?
Jesus peeped their thoughts and said, "What’s popping in your hearts?"
But when Jesus perceived their thoughts, he answering said unto them, What reason ye in your hearts?
Which is easier to say, "Your sins are forgiven," or "Get up and walk?"
Whether is easier, to say, Thy sins be forgiven thee; or to say, Rise up and walk?
So you know the Son of Man can forgive sins, he told the sick guy, "Get up, grab your mat, and bounce home."
But that ye may know that the Son of man hath power upon earth to forgive sins, (he said unto the sick of the palsy,) I say unto thee, Arise, and take up thy couch, and go into thine house.
And he straight up got up, took his mat, and dipped to his crib, giving props to God.
And immediately he rose up before them, and took up that whereon he lay, and departed to his own house, glorifying God.
Everyone was shook, praising God and saying, "We’ve seen some wild stuff today."
And they were all amazed, and they glorified God, and were filled with fear, saying, We have seen strange things to day.
Then Jesus rolled out and spotted Levi, a tax dude, chilling at his booth, and said, "Yo, follow me."
And after these things he went forth, and saw a publican, named Levi, sitting at the receipt of custom: and he said unto him, Follow me.
Levi ditched everything, got up, and followed him.
And he left all, rose up, and followed him.
Levi threw a lit feast at his house, and a whole crew of tax collectors and others were vibing with them.
And Levi made him a great feast in his own house: and there was a great company of publicans and of others that sat down with them.
But the scribes and Pharisees were lowkey complaining about his squad, saying, "Why are you eating with tax collectors and sinners?"
But their scribes and Pharisees murmured against his disciples, saying, Why do ye eat and drink with publicans and sinners?
Jesus was like, "Healthy peeps don’t need a doc; it’s the sick ones who need that help, fr."
And Jesus answering said unto them, They that are whole need not a physician; but they that are sick.
"I didn’t roll up to vibe with the righteous, but to call out the sinners to get their act together, periodt."
I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.
They were all like, "Why do John’s crew fast and pray all the time, while your squad is just munching and vibing?"
And they said unto him, Why do the disciples of John fast often, and make prayers, and likewise {the disciples} of the Pharisees; but thine eat and drink?
Jesus replied, "Can you make the wedding party fast when the groom’s right there with them? That’s sus."
And he said unto them, Can ye make the children of the bridechamber fast, while the bridegroom is with them?
"But there’s gonna be a time when the groom is gone, and then they’ll really be fasting."
But the days will come, when the bridegroom shall be taken away from them, and then shall they fast in those days.
He dropped a parable: "No one slaps a new patch on an old fit; otherwise, it’ll just mess everything up."
And he spake also a parable unto them; No man putteth a piece of a new garment upon an old; if otherwise, then both the new maketh a rent, and the piece that was {taken} out of the new agreeth not with the old.
"And no one pours new juice into old bottles; otherwise, the bottles will pop and it’s all gonna spill."
And no man putteth new wine into old bottles; else the new wine will burst the bottles, and be spilled, and the bottles shall perish.
"New juice needs new bottles, fam; that’s how you keep it fresh."
But new wine must be put into new bottles; and both are preserved.
"No one who’s had that old wine is gonna want the new stuff right away; they’ll be like, ‘The old vibes are better.’"
No man also having drunk old {wine} straightway desireth new: for he saith, The old is better.