Leviticus Chapter 22
So the Lord was like, "Moses, check this out."
And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,
Tell Aaron and his crew to keep their distance from Israel's holy stuff, and don’t mess with my name during their rituals: I’m the Lord, for real.
Speak unto Aaron and to his sons, that they separate themselves from the holy things of the children of Israel, and that they profane not my holy name {in those things} which they hallow unto me: I {am} the LORD.
Let them know, if anyone from your fam shows up to the holy stuff while they’re unclean, they’re getting cut off from my presence: I’m the Lord.
Say unto them, Whosoever {he be} of all your seed among your generations, that goeth unto the holy things, which the children of Israel hallow unto the LORD, having his uncleanness upon him, that soul shall be cut off from my presence: I {am} the LORD.
If a dude from Aaron’s crew has leprosy or some sick issue, he can’t chow down on the holy stuff until he's clean. And anyone who touches anything dead or unclean? Nope.
What man soever of the seed of Aaron {is} a leper, or hath a running issue; he shall not eat of the holy things, until he be clean. And whoso toucheth any thing {that is} unclean {by} the dead, or a man whose seed goeth from him; {running...: Heb. running of the reins}
Or if they touch any creepy crawly that makes them unclean, or a dude who spreads that uncleanness, whatever they touch is sus.
Or whosoever toucheth any creeping thing, whereby he may be made unclean, or a man of whom he may take uncleanness, whatsoever uncleanness he hath;
Anyone who comes into contact with that stuff is unclean until the evening and can’t eat the holy goods unless they wash up.
The soul which hath touched any such shall be unclean until even, and shall not eat of the holy things, unless he wash his flesh with water.
Once the sun sets, they’re clean and can dive into the holy stuff; it’s their food, no cap.
And when the sun is down, he shall be clean, and shall afterward eat of the holy things; because it {is} his food.
Don’t touch anything that dies on its own or gets ripped apart by animals; that’s just savage: I’m the Lord.
That which dieth of itself, or is torn {with beasts}, he shall not eat to defile himself therewith: I {am} the LORD.
They gotta stick to my rules, or they’ll catch sin because of it and die if they mess it up: I, the Lord, make them holy.
They shall therefore keep mine ordinance, lest they bear sin for it, and die therefore, if they profane it: I the LORD do sanctify them.
No outsiders are allowed to eat the holy stuff: a priest's guest or hired help can’t munch on that either.
There shall no stranger eat {of} the holy thing: a sojourner of the priest, or an hired servant, shall not eat {of} the holy thing.
If the priest buys a soul with his cash, he and his fam can munch on it, for real.
But if the priest buy {any} soul with his money, he shall eat of it, and he that is born in his house: they shall eat of his meat. {with...: Heb. with the purchase of his money}
If the priest's daughter gets married to someone outside the crew, she can’t snack on the holy vibes.
If the priest's daughter also be {married} unto a stranger, she may not eat of an offering of the holy things. {a stranger: Heb. a man a stranger}
But if the priest's daughter is single and chilling at her dad's place, she can feast on his meat, but no outsiders allowed, periodt.
But if the priest's daughter be a widow, or divorced, and have no child, and is returned unto her father's house, as in her youth, she shall eat of her father's meat: but there shall no stranger eat thereof.
If a dude eats something holy by accident, he gotta pay back a fifth and give it to the priest with the holy food, no cap.
And if a man eat {of} the holy thing unwittingly, then he shall put the fifth {part} thereof unto it, and shall give {it} unto the priest with the holy thing.
They can't mess with the holy stuff from the Israelites offered to the Lord; that’s just savage.
And they shall not profane the holy things of the children of Israel, which they offer unto the LORD;
Or let them take the blame for their slip-ups when they munch on the holy goods, 'cause I, the Lord, got them sanctified.
Or suffer them to bear the iniquity of trespass, when they eat their holy things: for I the LORD do sanctify them. {suffer...: or, lade themselves with the iniquity of trespass in their eating}
Then the Lord hit up Moses, saying,
And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,
Tell Aaron, his sons, and all the Israelites, that anyone from Israel or outsiders who wanna offer their gifts for vows or freewill offerings to the Lord for a burnt offering, gotta pay attention.
Speak unto Aaron, and to his sons, and unto all the children of Israel, and say unto them, Whatsoever {he be} of the house of Israel, or of the strangers in Israel, that will offer his oblation for all his vows, and for all his freewill offerings, which they will offer unto the LORD for a burnt offering;
You gotta bring a flawless male, no defects, from the cows, sheep, or goats; that’s the vibe.
{Ye shall offer} at your own will a male without blemish, of the beeves, of the sheep, or of the goats.
But if it’s got a flaw, don’t even consider offering it; it’s not gonna cut it, no cap.
{But} whatsoever hath a blemish, {that} shall ye not offer: for it shall not be acceptable for you.
If you’re bringing peace offerings to the Lord to keep it 100 or just vibing with some freewill offerings of cows or sheep, make sure they’re perfect, no cap.
And whosoever offereth a sacrifice of peace offerings unto the LORD to accomplish {his} vow, or a freewill offering in beeves or sheep, it shall be perfect to be accepted; there shall be no blemish therein. {sheep: or, goats}
Don’t bring anything blind, broken, or sus to the Lord, like, no way. No fire offerings of those on the altar, fam.
Blind, or broken, or maimed, or having a wen, or scurvy, or scabbed, ye shall not offer these unto the LORD, nor make an offering by fire of them upon the altar unto the LORD.
You can offer a bull or lamb that’s a bit off or missing something for a freewill offering, but if it’s for a vow, that’s a no-go.
Either a bullock or a lamb that hath any thing superfluous or lacking in his parts, that mayest thou offer {for} a freewill offering; but for a vow it shall not be accepted. {lamb: or, kid}
Don’t offer anything bruised, crushed, or sliced to the Lord; keep it clean, for real.
Ye shall not offer unto the LORD that which is bruised, or crushed, or broken, or cut; neither shall ye make {any offering thereof} in your land.
Don’t take the bread of your God from a stranger’s hands if it’s got flaws; that’s just not it, and it won’t be accepted.
Neither from a stranger's hand shall ye offer the bread of your God of any of these; because their corruption {is} in them, {and} blemishes {be} in them: they shall not be accepted for you.
The Lord hit up Moses again, saying,
And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,
When you bring a bull, sheep, or goat, chill with it for seven days with its mom, and then from day eight, it’s good to go for a fire offering.
When a bullock, or a sheep, or a goat, is brought forth, then it shall be seven days under the dam; and from the eighth day and thenceforth it shall be accepted for an offering made by fire unto the LORD.
Whether it’s a cow or ewe, don’t take them out on the same day; that’s just savage.
And {whether it be} cow or ewe, ye shall not kill it and her young both in one day. {ewe: or, she goat}
When you wanna offer a thank-you sacrifice to the Lord, do it on your own terms, no cap.
And when ye will offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving unto the LORD, offer {it} at your own will.
Eat it all on the same day; don’t leave leftovers for tomorrow: I’m the Lord, periodt.
On the same day it shall be eaten up; ye shall leave none of it until the morrow: I {am} the LORD.
So like, follow my rules and keep them, ya feel? I’m the Lord, for real.
Therefore shall ye keep my commandments, and do them: I {am} the LORD.
Don’t be disrespecting my holy name; I’m gonna be revered by the fam of Israel, for sure. I’m the Lord who makes you holy.
Neither shall ye profane my holy name; but I will be hallowed among the children of Israel: I {am} the LORD which hallow you,
I pulled you outta Egypt to be your God, fr. I’m the Lord.
That brought you out of the land of Egypt, to be your God: I {am} the LORD.