Judges Chapter 4
Once again, the Israelites were up to some sus behavior in front of the Lord after Ehud kicked the bucket.
And the children of Israel again did evil in the sight of the LORD, when Ehud was dead.
So God was like, "Bet," and allowed Jabin, the Canaan king, to flex on them from Hazor; his right-hand man was Sisera, just chilling in Harosheth with his crew.
And the LORD sold them into the hand of Jabin king of Canaan, that reigned in Hazor; the captain of whose host {was} Sisera, which dwelt in Harosheth of the Gentiles.
The Israelites cried out to the Lord since Sisera had like 900 iron chariots and was seriously pressing them for twenty years.
And the children of Israel cried unto the LORD: for he had nine hundred chariots of iron; and twenty years he mightily oppressed the children of Israel.
Deborah, a prophetess and Lapidoth's wifey, was holding it down as the judge of Israel at that time.
And Deborah, a prophetess, the wife of Lapidoth, she judged Israel at that time.
She was vibing under Deborah's palm tree chillin' between Ramah and Beth-el in Ephraim, and folks from Israel came to her for some judgment.
And she dwelt under the palm tree of Deborah between Ramah and Bethel in mount Ephraim: and the children of Israel came up to her for judgment.
She hit up Barak, son of Abinoam from Kedesh-naphtali, and was like, "Didn’t God tell you to roll out to mount Tabor and grab ten thousand homies from Naphtali and Zebulun?"
And she sent and called Barak the son of Abinoam out of Kedeshnaphtali, and said unto him, Hath not the LORD God of Israel commanded, {saying}, Go and draw toward mount Tabor, and take with thee ten thousand men of the children of Naphtali and of the children of Zebulun?
"I’ll lead Sisera, Jabin’s top guy, to the Kishon River with his chariots and squad, then hand him over to you."
And I will draw unto thee to the river Kishon Sisera, the captain of Jabin's army, with his chariots and his multitude; and I will deliver him into thine hand.
Barak was like, "If you come with me, I’m down; if not, I’m chilling here."
And Barak said unto her, If thou wilt go with me, then I will go: but if thou wilt not go with me, {then} I will not go.
She responded, "I’m totally down to roll with you, but just a heads up: this journey won’t be your big moment; God’s gonna hand Sisera over to a woman." Then Deborah got up and went with Barak to Kedesh.
And she said, I will surely go with thee: notwithstanding the journey that thou takest shall not be for thine honour; for the LORD shall sell Sisera into the hand of a woman. And Deborah arose, and went with Barak to Kedesh.
Barak called Zebulun and Naphtali to Kedesh, and he showed up with ten thousand guys at his feet, while Deborah went up with him.
And Barak called Zebulun and Naphtali to Kedesh; and he went up with ten thousand men at his feet: and Deborah went up with him.
Heber the Kenite, from Hobab’s fam (Moses' father-in-law), was doing his own thing, setting up camp in the plain of Zaanaim near Kedesh.
Now Heber the Kenite, {which was} of the children of Hobab the father in law of Moses, had severed himself from the Kenites, and pitched his tent unto the plain of Zaanaim, which {is} by Kedesh.
They told Sisera that Barak, son of Abinoam, had rolled up to mount Tabor.
And they shewed Sisera that Barak the son of Abinoam was gone up to mount Tabor.
Sisera gathered all his chariots, close to 900 iron ones, and his crew from Harosheth to the Kishon River.
And Sisera gathered together all his chariots, {even} nine hundred chariots of iron, and all the people that {were} with him, from Harosheth of the Gentiles unto the river of Kishon. {together: Heb. by cry, or, proclamation}
Deborah told Barak, "Let’s make this happen; today’s the day the Lord hands Sisera to you. Didn’t God go ahead of you?" So Barak rolled down from mount Tabor with ten thousand guys behind him.
And Deborah said unto Barak, Up; for this {is} the day in which the LORD hath delivered Sisera into thine hand: is not the LORD gone out before thee? So Barak went down from mount Tabor, and ten thousand men after him.
The Lord totally took out Sisera and all his chariots before Barak, making Sisera bail out of his ride and dip on foot.
And the LORD discomfited Sisera, and all {his} chariots, and all {his} host, with the edge of the sword before Barak; so that Sisera lighted down off {his} chariot, and fled away on his feet.
Barak went after the chariots and the crew to Harosheth, and Sisera's whole squad fell by the sword; no one was left standing.
But Barak pursued after the chariots, and after the host, unto Harosheth of the Gentiles: and all the host of Sisera fell upon the edge of the sword; {and} there was not a man left. {a man: Heb. unto one}
Sisera ran on foot to Jael’s tent, Heber’s wife, 'cause there was peace between Jabin and Heber’s crew.
Howbeit Sisera fled away on his feet to the tent of Jael the wife of Heber the Kenite: for {there was} peace between Jabin the king of Hazor and the house of Heber the Kenite.
Jael met Sisera and was like, "Come in, my dude, don’t trip." Once he was inside, she tossed a blanket over him.
And Jael went out to meet Sisera, and said unto him, Turn in, my lord, turn in to me; fear not. And when he had turned in unto her into the tent, she covered him with a mantle. {mantle: or, rug, or, blanket}
He asked her for some water, saying he was parched, and she hooked him up with milk and covered him up.
And he said unto her, Give me, I pray thee, a little water to drink; for I am thirsty. And she opened a bottle of milk, and gave him drink, and covered him.
He told her, "Stand by the tent door, and if anyone asks if there’s a man here, just say no."
Again he said unto her, Stand in the door of the tent, and it shall be, when any man doth come and enquire of thee, and say, Is there any man here? that thou shalt say, No.
Then Jael grabbed a tent peg and hammer, snuck up on him while he was deep in sleep, and hammered the peg into his temples, fastening it to the ground. Dude was out cold.
Then Jael Heber's wife took a nail of the tent, and took an hammer in her hand, and went softly unto him, and smote the nail into his temples, and fastened it into the ground: for he was fast asleep and weary. So he died. {and took: Heb. and put}
While Barak was still chasing Sisera, Jael came out to meet him, saying, "Come peep the dude you’re after." When he entered her tent, Sisera was dead, and the peg was in his head.
And, behold, as Barak pursued Sisera, Jael came out to meet him, and said unto him, Come, and I will shew thee the man whom thou seekest. And when he came into her {tent}, behold, Sisera lay dead, and the nail {was} in his temples.
So God straight-up humbled Jabin, the king of Canaan, that day before the Israelites.
So God subdued on that day Jabin the king of Canaan before the children of Israel.
The Israelites were thriving, taking down Jabin, the king of Canaan, until they totally wiped him out.
And the hand of the children of Israel prospered, and prevailed against Jabin the king of Canaan, until they had destroyed Jabin king of Canaan. {prospered...: Heb. going went and was hard}