Acts Chapter 25
So Festus showed up in the province, and after three days, he jetted from Cesarea to Jerusalem.
Now when Festus was come into the province, after three days he ascended from Caesarea to Jerusalem.
The high priest and the big shots of the Jews hit him up about Paul and were like, "Yo, you gotta make moves on this situation."
Then the high priest and the chief of the Jews informed him against Paul, and besought him,
They wanted him to send for Paul to Jerusalem, scheming to take him out on the way, no cap.
And desired favour against him, that he would send for him to Jerusalem, laying wait in the way to kill him.
But Festus was like, "Nah, Paul’s staying in Cesarea, and I’ll peep there soon."
But Festus answered, that Paul should be kept at Caesarea, and that he himself would depart shortly {thither}.
He told them, "If you’re down, roll with me and bring the proof if this guy's sus."
Let them therefore, said he, which among you are able, go down with {me}, and accuse this man, if there be any wickedness in him.
After chilling with them for over ten days, he bounced to Cesarea; the next day, he sat on the judgment seat and called for Paul.
And when he had tarried among them more than ten days, he went down unto Caesarea; and the next day sitting on the judgment seat commanded Paul to be brought. {more...: or, as some copies read, no more than eight or ten days}
When Paul came through, the Jews from Jerusalem surrounded him, throwing shade with all these heavy allegations they couldn’t back up.
And when he was come, the Jews which came down from Jerusalem stood round about, and laid many and grievous complaints against Paul, which they could not prove.
Paul was like, "I ain't done nothing wrong against the Jews, the temple, or Caesar, fr."
While he answered for himself, Neither against the law of the Jews, neither against the temple, nor yet against Caesar, have I offended any thing at all.
But Festus, trying to keep the Jews pleased, asked Paul, "You wanna head to Jerusalem and get judged there?"
But Festus, willing to do the Jews a pleasure, answered Paul, and said, Wilt thou go up to Jerusalem, and there be judged of these things before me?
Paul shot back, "I’m at Caesar’s judgment seat, where I should be judged: I’ve done nothing wrong to the Jews, you know that."
Then said Paul, I stand at Caesar's judgment seat, where I ought to be judged: to the Jews have I done no wrong, as thou very well knowest.
If I’m guilty or did something that’s a vibe killer, I’m ready to take the heat. But if that's not the case, no cap, no one can throw me under the bus. I’m appealing to Caesar.
For if I be an offender, or have committed any thing worthy of death, I refuse not to die: but if there be none of these things whereof these accuse me, no man may deliver me unto them. I appeal unto Caesar.
Then Festus, after vibing with the council, was like, "You appealed to Caesar? Bet, you’re heading to Caesar."
Then Festus, when he had conferred with the council, answered, Hast thou appealed unto Caesar? unto Caesar shalt thou go.
A few days later, King Agrippa and Bernice rolled up to Caesarea to show some respect to Festus.
And after certain days king Agrippa and Bernice came unto Caesarea to salute Festus.
After they chilled for a bit, Festus dropped the details about Paul, saying, "There’s this dude stuck in chains thanks to Felix."
And when they had been there many days, Festus declared Paul's cause unto the king, saying, There is a certain man left in bonds by Felix:
When I was in Jerusalem, the top priests and the elders came at me, wanting to throw shade on him.
About whom, when I was at Jerusalem, the chief priests and the elders of the Jews informed {me}, desiring {to have} judgment against him.
I told them, "It’s not how we do things in Rome to hand someone over to die without the accusers being face to face and letting the accused defend themselves."
To whom I answered, It is not the manner of the Romans to deliver any man to die, before that he which is accused have the accusers face to face, and have licence to answer for himself concerning the crime laid against him.
So when they showed up, I didn’t waste time. The next day, I took my seat and called for the dude.
Therefore, when they were come hither, without any delay on the morrow I sat on the judgment seat, and commanded the man to be brought forth.
When the accusers stood up, they didn’t even bring the heat with the charges I expected.
Against whom when the accusers stood up, they brought none accusation of such things as I supposed:
They had some questions about their own beliefs and this dude Jesus who was dead, but Paul was claiming he’s alive.
But had certain questions against him of their own superstition, and of one Jesus, which was dead, whom Paul affirmed to be alive.
Since I was sus about these questions, I asked him if he wanted to go to Jerusalem and be judged there.
And because I doubted of such manner of questions, I asked {him} whether he would go to Jerusalem, and there be judged of these matters. {I doubted...: or, I was doubtful how to enquire hereof}
So Paul was like, "I wanna chill with Augustus," and I told them to keep him until I could send him to Caesar.
But when Paul had appealed to be reserved unto the hearing of Augustus, I commanded him to be kept till I might send him to Caesar. {hearing: or, judgment}
Agrippa was like, "I wanna hear this dude myself," and he said, "Tomorrow, you’ll get the lowdown."
Then Agrippa said unto Festus, I would also hear the man myself. To morrow, said he, thou shalt hear him.
The next day, Agrippa and Bernice rolled up all decked out, and at Festus’ orders, Paul was brought in.
And on the morrow, when Agrippa was come, and Bernice, with great pomp, and was entered into the place of hearing, with the chief captains, and principal men of the city, at Festus' commandment Paul was brought forth.
Festus was like, "Yo, King Agrippa and everyone here, check out this guy. The Jews are all like, 'He shouldn't be alive,' for real."
And Festus said, King Agrippa, and all men which are here present with us, ye see this man, about whom all the multitude of the Jews have dealt with me, both at Jerusalem, and {also} here, crying that he ought not to live any longer.
But when I saw he didn’t do anything that deserves a death sentence and he called out to Augustus, I’m sending him, no cap.
But when I found that he had committed nothing worthy of death, and that he himself hath appealed to Augustus, I have determined to send him.
I got nothing solid to jot down for my boss, so I brought him here, especially for you, King Agrippa, to have something to write about after we chat.
Of whom I have no certain thing to write unto my lord. Wherefore I have brought him forth before you, and specially before thee, O king Agrippa, that, after examination had, I might have somewhat to write.
It just feels sus to send a prisoner without saying what he did wrong, fr.
For it seemeth to me unreasonable to send a prisoner, and not withal to signify the crimes {laid} against him.