Mark Chapter 9
So Jesus was like, "For real, some of y’all here won’t even take a dirt nap before you peep the kingdom of God flexing with mad power."
And he said unto them, Verily I say unto you, That there be some of them that stand here, which shall not taste of death, till they have seen the kingdom of God come with power.
After six days, Jesus brought along Peter, James, and John up this sick mountain, just them chilling together; then he totally transformed right in front of them.
And after six days Jesus taketh {with him} Peter, and James, and John, and leadeth them up into an high mountain apart by themselves: and he was transfigured before them.
His style was shining bright, whiter than fresh snow; nobody on Earth could get that clean.
And his raiment became shining, exceeding white as snow; so as no fuller on earth can white them.
Then they peeped Elijah and Moses just hanging with Jesus, having a deep chat.
And there appeared unto them Elias with Moses: and they were talking with Jesus.
Peter was like, "This is lit! Let’s throw up three tents here, one for you, one for Moses, and one for Elijah."
And Peter answered and said to Jesus, Master, it is good for us to be here: and let us make three tabernacles; one for thee, and one for Moses, and one for Elias.
He was clueless about what to say, 'cause they were all straight up shook.
For he wist not what to say; for they were sore afraid.
Then a cloud rolled in and covered them, and a voice from the cloud said, "This is my beloved Son; you better listen to him."
And there was a cloud that overshadowed them: and a voice came out of the cloud, saying, This is my beloved Son: hear him.
Then, outta nowhere, they looked around and it was just Jesus, no one else in sight.
And suddenly, when they had looked round about, they saw no man any more, save Jesus only with themselves.
As they headed down the mountain, Jesus was like, "Keep it on the DL; don’t spill the tea on what you saw until the Son of Man rises from the dead."
And as they came down from the mountain, he charged them that they should tell no man what things they had seen, till the Son of man were risen from the dead.
They kept that hush-hush, wondering what this whole rising from the dead vibe was about.
And they kept that saying with themselves, questioning one with another what the rising from the dead should mean.
They were curious, asking, "Why do the scribes say Elias has to be the opener?"
And they asked him, saying, Why say the scribes that Elias must first come?
He was like, "No cap, Elias is coming to set things straight; but it’s written that the Son of Man has to go through some tough stuff."
And he answered and told them, Elias verily cometh first, and restoreth all things; and how it is written of the Son of man, that he must suffer many things, and be set at nought.
But I’m telling you, Elias already came, and they did whatever they felt like to him, just like it was written down.
But I say unto you, That Elias is indeed come, and they have done unto him whatsoever they listed, as it is written of him.
When he got to his crew, he saw a crowd vibing around them, and the scribes were throwing out questions at them.
And when he came to {his} disciples, he saw a great multitude about them, and the scribes questioning with them.
Everyone was shook when they saw him, and they rushed up like, "What’s popping?"
And straightway all the people, when they beheld him, were greatly amazed, and running to {him} saluted him.
He asked the scribes, "What’s the deal with those guys?"
And he asked the scribes, What question ye with them? {with them: or, among yourselves}
One dude from the crowd said, "Yo, Master, I brought my son; he’s got a spirit that’s totally mute."
And one of the multitude answered and said, Master, I have brought unto thee my son, which hath a dumb spirit;
Whenever the spirit jumps in, he’s going wild: foaming, grinding his teeth, and acting super sus. I told your disciples to kick it out, but they couldn’t handle it.
And wheresoever he taketh him, he teareth him: and he foameth, and gnasheth with his teeth, and pineth away: and I spake to thy disciples that they should cast him out; and they could not. {teareth...: or, dasheth him}
He replied, "O faithless peeps, how long I gotta be here with you? How long I gotta deal with this? Bring him to me."
He answereth him, and saith, O faithless generation, how long shall I be with you? how long shall I suffer you? bring him unto me.
So they brought him over, and when he saw the kid, the spirit threw a fit and slammed him down; he hit the ground, foaming everywhere.
And they brought him unto him: and when he saw him, straightway the spirit tare him; and he fell on the ground, and wallowed foaming.
He asked the dad, "How long has this been happening?" And his dad was like, "Since he was little, no cap."
And he asked his father, How long is it ago since this came unto him? And he said, Of a child.
Most of the time, it throws him into fire and water to mess him up, but if you can do anything, show us some compassion and help us, fr.
And ofttimes it hath cast him into the fire, and into the waters, to destroy him: but if thou canst do any thing, have compassion on us, and help us.
Jesus told him, "If you can believe, anything's possible for the ones who have faith."
Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things {are} possible to him that believeth.
Immediately, the kid's dad shouted out with tears, "Lord, I believe; help my lack of faith, periodt."
And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.
When Jesus saw the crowd racing over, he called out the unclean spirit, saying, "You dumb and deaf spirit, I’m telling you to come out of him and never come back again."
When Jesus saw that the people came running together, he rebuked the foul spirit, saying unto him, {Thou} dumb and deaf spirit, I charge thee, come out of him, and enter no more into him.
The spirit screamed, tossed him around, and came out; he looked dead, and many were like, "He’s gone."
And {the spirit} cried, and rent him sore, and came out of him: and he was as one dead; insomuch that many said, He is dead.
But Jesus grabbed his hand and lifted him up; he got back up, no doubt.
But Jesus took him by the hand, and lifted him up; and he arose.
Once they got inside the house, the disciples asked him privately, "Why couldn’t we kick it out?"
And when he was come into the house, his disciples asked him privately, Why could not we cast him out?
He said to them, "This type only comes out by prayer and fasting, for real."
And he said unto them, This kind can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting.
Then they dipped from there and passed through Galilee, and he didn’t want anyone to catch wind, no cap.
And they departed thence, and passed through Galilee; and he would not that any man should know {it}.
He was teaching the squad, saying, "The Son of Man’s gonna be handed over to some folks; they’re gonna take him out; but don’t sweat it, he’ll bounce back on day three."
For he taught his disciples, and said unto them, The Son of man is delivered into the hands of men, and they shall kill him; and after that he is killed, he shall rise the third day.
But they were like, "What?" and didn’t want to ask him for the tea.
But they understood not that saying, and were afraid to ask him.
When he rolled up to Capernaum, he was chilling at the crib and asked them, "Yo, what were y’all arguing about on the way?"
And he came to Capernaum: and being in the house he asked them, What was it that ye disputed among yourselves by the way?
But they went quiet 'cause they were busy debating who was the GOAT among them.
But they held their peace: for by the way they had disputed among themselves, who {should be} the greatest.
So he sat down, called the twelve, and said, "If you wanna be first, you gotta be last and serve everyone, no cap."
And he sat down, and called the twelve, and saith unto them, If any man desire to be first, {the same} shall be last of all, and servant of all.
He scooped up a kid and placed him in front of them, saying,
And he took a child, and set him in the midst of them: and when he had taken him in his arms, he said unto them,
"Whoever vibes with one of these kids in my name, vibes with me; and whoever vibes with me, vibes not just with me but with the one who sent me."
Whosoever shall receive one of such children in my name, receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me, receiveth not me, but him that sent me.
John was like, "Yo, Rabbi, we saw someone casting out demons in your name, but he’s not rolling with us, so we told him to chill."
And John answered him, saying, Master, we saw one casting out devils in thy name, and he followeth not us: and we forbad him, because he followeth not us.
But Jesus was like, "Don’t stop him; no one who does miracles in my name is gonna talk smack about me."
But Jesus said, Forbid him not: for there is no man which shall do a miracle in my name, that can lightly speak evil of me.
"Whoever isn’t against us is totally on our side."
For he that is not against us is on our part.
If anyone hooks you up with a cup of water in my name 'cause you're rolling with Christ, no cap, they’re getting props for that.
For whosoever shall give you a cup of water to drink in my name, because ye belong to Christ, verily I say unto you, he shall not lose his reward.
But if you mess with one of these little believers, that's sus. Better to have a millstone around your neck and be tossed in the sea, fr.
And whosoever shall offend one of {these} little ones that believe in me, it is better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he were cast into the sea.
If your hand's causing you problems, just chop it off. Better to roll into life missing a hand than to have two hands and end up in the fire that never goes out, periodt.
And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: {offend...: or, cause thee to offend}
Where the worm never dies, and the fire just keeps raging.
Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched.
If your foot's tripping you up, cut it off. Better to hobble into life than to have two feet and get sent to the fire that never goes out, no cap.
And if thy foot offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter halt into life, than having two feet to be cast into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: {offend...: or, cause thee to offend}
Where the worm never dies, and the fire just keeps raging.
Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched.
If your eye's causing you issues, pluck it out. Better to vibe with one eye in God's kingdom than to have two eyes and end up in the fire, fr.
And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire: {offend...: or, cause thee to offend}
Where the worm never dies, and the fire just keeps raging.
Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched.
Everyone’s gonna be seasoned with fire, and every sacrifice gets that salt treatment, bet.
For every one shall be salted with fire, and every sacrifice shall be salted with salt.
Salt’s fire, but if it loses its vibe, how you gonna spice things up? Keep that salt in you and vibe with each other, periodt.
Salt {is} good: but if the salt have lost his saltness, wherewith will ye season it? Have salt in yourselves, and have peace one with another.