Luke Chapter 9
He gathered his twelve homies and granted them mad power over all the demons and the ability to heal the sick.
Then he called his twelve disciples together, and gave them power and authority over all devils, and to cure diseases.
So he sent them out to spread the good vibes of God's kingdom and to aid the sick.
And he sent them to preach the kingdom of God, and to heal the sick.
He was like, "Don’t pack anything for the journey, no sticks, no bags, no bread, no cash; not even two jackets."
And he said unto them, Take nothing for {your} journey, neither staves, nor scrip, neither bread, neither money; neither have two coats apiece.
When you arrive at a crib, just chill there and bounce when you're ready.
And whatsoever house ye enter into, there abide, and thence depart.
If anyone ain’t down to vibe with you when you leave that town, just shake the dust off your kicks to flex on them.
And whosoever will not receive you, when ye go out of that city, shake off the very dust from your feet for a testimony against them.
They rolled out and hit the towns, preaching the good news and healing folks everywhere.
And they departed, and went through the towns, preaching the gospel, and healing every where.
Herod the tetrarch caught wind of all the wild happenings and was shook because some said John was back from the dead;
Now Herod the tetrarch heard of all that was done by him: and he was perplexed, because that it was said of some, that John was risen from the dead;
others said Elijah had shown up; and some figured one of the old prophets was back in action.
And of some, that Elias had appeared; and of others, that one of the old prophets was risen again.
Herod was like, "I chopped John’s head off, but who is this dude I keep hearing about? I gotta see him."
And Herod said, John have I beheaded: but who is this, of whom I hear such things? And he desired to see him.
When the apostles came back, they spilled the tea on everything they did. He took them away to a chill spot out in the desert near Bethsaida.
And the apostles, when they were returned, told him all that they had done. And he took them, and went aside privately into a desert place belonging to the city called Bethsaida.
The squad figured it out and rolled with him. He was all about that kingdom of God vibe, healing everyone who needed it.
And the people, when they knew {it}, followed him: and he received them, and spake unto them of the kingdom of God, and healed them that had need of healing.
As the day wound down, the twelve came through and were like, "Yo, send the crowd away so they can hit the towns for some food. We’re chillin' in the desert, no cap."
And when the day began to wear away, then came the twelve, and said unto him, Send the multitude away, that they may go into the towns and country round about, and lodge, and get victuals: for we are here in a desert place.
But he was like, "Nah, you feed them." They replied, "We only got five loaves and two fish; we'd have to bounce to get enough grub for all these peeps."
But he said unto them, Give ye them to eat. And they said, We have no more but five loaves and two fishes; except we should go and buy meat for all this people.
There were about five thousand dudes there. He told his crew, "Have them sit down in groups of fifty."
For they were about five thousand men. And he said to his disciples, Make them sit down by fifties in a company.
They did what he said and got everyone to sit.
And they did so, and made them all sit down.
Then he took those five loaves and two fish, looked up to heaven, blessed them, broke them, and handed them to his crew to serve the crowd.
Then he took the five loaves and the two fishes, and looking up to heaven, he blessed them, and brake, and gave to the disciples to set before the multitude.
Everyone ate and was stuffed, and they gathered up twelve baskets of leftovers.
And they did eat, and were all filled: and there was taken up of fragments that remained to them twelve baskets.
Later, while he was chilling and praying solo, his crew was with him. He asked, "What are people saying about me?"
And it came to pass, as he was alone praying, his disciples were with him: and he asked them, saying, Whom say the people that I am?
They replied, "Some say you're John the Baptist, others say Elijah, and some think you're one of the old prophets back from the dead."
They answering said, John the Baptist; but some {say}, Elias; and others {say}, that one of the old prophets is risen again.
He asked them, "But who do you say I am?" Peter was like, "You’re the Christ of God, fr."
He said unto them, But whom say ye that I am? Peter answering said, The Christ of God.
He was like, "Y’all better keep this on the down-low, no cap."
And he straitly charged them, and commanded {them} to tell no man that thing;
He said, "The Son of Man's gonna face some serious stuff, get rejected by the OGs, and then get taken out, but don't trip, he’ll bounce back on day three."
Saying, The Son of man must suffer many things, and be rejected of the elders and chief priests and scribes, and be slain, and be raised the third day.
He told everyone, "If you wanna roll with me, you gotta ditch your ego, pick up your cross daily, and follow my lead."
And he said to {them} all, If any {man} will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.
"Whoever tries to save their own vibe is gonna lose it; but if you give it up for me, you’ll end up saving it, fr."
For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it.
"What’s the point of stacking all the clout in the world if you lose yourself in the process? That's just sus."
For what is a man advantaged, if he gain the whole world, and lose himself, or be cast away?
"If you’re ashamed of me and my words, I’ll be lowkey embarrassed of you when I roll up in my glory, with my Dad and the holy squad."
For whosoever shall be ashamed of me and of my words, of him shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he shall come in his own glory, and {in his} Father's, and of the holy angels.
"Real talk, some of y’all here won’t even taste death until you peep the kingdom of God."
But I tell you of a truth, there be some standing here, which shall not taste of death, till they see the kingdom of God.
"About a week later, he took Peter, John, and James up a mountain to pray, vibes."
And it came to pass about an eight days after these sayings, he took Peter and John and James, and went up into a mountain to pray. {sayings: or, things}
"While he was praying, his whole vibe shifted, and his clothes were shining bright, like, wow."
And as he prayed, the fashion of his countenance was altered, and his raiment {was} white {and} glistering.
"And outta nowhere, two legends, Moses and Elijah, were chatting with him."
And, behold, there talked with him two men, which were Moses and Elias:
Dude showed up all glorious and was like, "I gotta dip from this life in Jerusalem, fr."
Who appeared in glory, and spake of his decease which he should accomplish at Jerusalem.
But Peter and the squad were super sleepy, and when they finally woke up, they saw his glow and the two homies chilling with him.
But Peter and they that were with him were heavy with sleep: and when they were awake, they saw his glory, and the two men that stood with him.
As they were bouncing, Peter was like, "Yo, Jesus, this vibe is dope! Let’s build three tents—one for you, one for Moses, and one for Elias," not even knowing what he was saying.
And it came to pass, as they departed from him, Peter said unto Jesus, Master, it is good for us to be here: and let us make three tabernacles; one for thee, and one for Moses, and one for Elias: not knowing what he said.
While he was talking, a cloud rolled in and covered them, and they were shook as they stepped into it.
While he thus spake, there came a cloud, and overshadowed them: and they feared as they entered into the cloud.
Then a voice came from the cloud, saying, "This is my beloved Son; you better listen to him."
And there came a voice out of the cloud, saying, This is my beloved Son: hear him.
Once the voice was gone, Jesus was solo. They kept it on the down-low and didn’t spill the tea about what they saw.
And when the voice was past, Jesus was found alone. And they kept {it} close, and told no man in those days any of those things which they had seen.
The next day, when they came down from the hill, mad people showed up to see him.
And it came to pass, that on the next day, when they were come down from the hill, much people met him.
And, check it, a dude from the crowd yelled, "Master, please look at my son; he’s my only kid!"
And, behold, a man of the company cried out, saying, Master, I beseech thee, look upon my son: for he is mine only child.
And, for real, a spirit messes with him, and he screams out; it’s a whole struggle and he’s foaming, like, savage vibes.
And, lo, a spirit taketh him, and he suddenly crieth out; and it teareth him that he foameth again, and bruising him hardly departeth from him.
I asked your crew to kick it out, but they couldn’t, no cap.
And I besought thy disciples to cast him out; and they could not.
Jesus was like, "Yo, this faithless and wild crew, how long I gotta chill with y'all? Bring your kid over here, no cap."
And Jesus answering said, O faithless and perverse generation, how long shall I be with you, and suffer you? Bring thy son hither.
As the kid was rolling up, the devil straight-up knocked him down. Jesus was like, "Chill, unclean spirit," and healed the kid, then sent him back to his dad.
And as he was yet a coming, the devil threw him down, and tare {him}. And Jesus rebuked the unclean spirit, and healed the child, and delivered him again to his father.
Everyone was shook at God's power, but while they were vibing over everything Jesus did, he turned to his squad and said,
And they were all amazed at the mighty power of God. But while they wondered every one at all things which Jesus did, he said unto his disciples,
"Let these words hit different: the Son of Man is gonna get handed over to the homies."
Let these sayings sink down into your ears: for the Son of man shall be delivered into the hands of men.
But they were totally lost on this and it was lowkey hidden from them, so they were too sus to ask him about it.
But they understood not this saying, and it was hid from them, that they perceived it not: and they feared to ask him of that saying.
Then they started debating who was the GOAT among them.
Then there arose a reasoning among them, which of them should be greatest.
Jesus peeped their thoughts, grabbed a kid, and brought him over.
And Jesus, perceiving the thought of their heart, took a child, and set him by him,
He said, "Whoever vibes with this kid in my name is vibing with me; and whoever vibes with me is vibing with the one who sent me. For real, the least among you is the one who's actually great."
And said unto them, Whosoever shall receive this child in my name receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me receiveth him that sent me: for he that is least among you all, the same shall be great.
John was like, "Yo, Master, we saw someone casting out demons in your name, but we told him to stop 'cause he ain't rolling with us."
And John answered and said, Master, we saw one casting out devils in thy name; and we forbad him, because he followeth not with us.
Jesus said, "Don’t stop him: if he ain't against us, he’s with us, periodt."
And Jesus said unto him, Forbid {him} not: for he that is not against us is for us.
So, when the time hit, he was like, "I’m vibing to Jerusalem," and he was super determined.
And it came to pass, when the time was come that he should be received up, he stedfastly set his face to go to Jerusalem,
He sent some peeps ahead to prep a spot for him in a Samaritan village.
And sent messengers before his face: and they went, and entered into a village of the Samaritans, to make ready for him.
But they were sus and didn’t welcome him 'cause he looked like he was heading to Jerusalem.
And they did not receive him, because his face was as though he would go to Jerusalem.
James and John saw this and were like, "Yo, should we call down fire from heaven and roast them like Elias did?"
And when his disciples James and John saw {this}, they said, Lord, wilt thou that we command fire to come down from heaven, and consume them, even as Elias did?
But he turned and was like, "Chill, you don’t even know what kind of vibe you’re on."
But he turned, and rebuked them, and said, Ye know not what manner of spirit ye are of.
For the Son of Man didn’t come to roast people, but to save them. Then they bounced to another village.
For the Son of man is not come to destroy men's lives, but to save {them}. And they went to another village.
As they were rolling, a dude said, "Lord, I’m down to follow you wherever."
And it came to pass, that, as they went in the way, a certain {man} said unto him, Lord, I will follow thee whithersoever thou goest.
Jesus replied, "Foxes got their digs, birds got their nests, but the Son of Man ain't got a place to crash."
And Jesus said unto him, Foxes have holes, and birds of the air {have} nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay {his} head.
He told another, "Follow me." But dude was like, "Wait, let me bury my pops first."
And he said unto another, Follow me. But he said, Lord, suffer me first to go and bury my father.
Jesus was like, "Let the dead handle their own. You go out and spread the kingdom of God, periodt."
Jesus said unto him, Let the dead bury their dead: but go thou and preach the kingdom of God.
Another dude was like, "Yo, Lord, I’m down to roll with you, but let me say bye to my peeps at home first."
And another also said, Lord, I will follow thee; but let me first go bid them farewell, which are at home at my house.
Jesus was like, "Nah fam, if you start this grind and keep looking back, you ain't ready for the kingdom of God."
And Jesus said unto him, No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.