Exodus Chapter 8
So God was like, "Moses, you need to hit up Pharaoh and say, 'Let my people go so they can vibe with me.'"
And the LORD spake unto Moses, Go unto Pharaoh, and say unto him, Thus saith the LORD, Let my people go, that they may serve me.
If you don’t let them dip, I’m about to unleash a whole army of frogs on your turf, no cap.
And if thou refuse to let {them} go, behold, I will smite all thy borders with frogs:
The river's gonna flood with frogs everywhere, like, you’ll find them in your crib, your bed, and even your kitchens, fr.
And the river shall bring forth frogs abundantly, which shall go up and come into thine house, and into thy bedchamber, and upon thy bed, and into the house of thy servants, and upon thy people, and into thine ovens, and into thy kneadingtroughs: {kneadingtroughs: or, dough}
Frogs gonna be all over your scene, on you, your crew, and all your servants too.
And the frogs shall come up both on thee, and upon thy people, and upon all thy servants.
God told Moses to pass the message to Aaron, saying, 'Wave your stick over the waters and make those frogs pop up in Egypt.'
And the LORD spake unto Moses, Say unto Aaron, Stretch forth thine hand with thy rod over the streams, over the rivers, and over the ponds, and cause frogs to come up upon the land of Egypt.
Aaron followed through, and just like that, frogs came out and took over Egypt, it was insane.
And Aaron stretched out his hand over the waters of Egypt; and the frogs came up, and covered the land of Egypt.
The magicians tried to flex their skills, and they conjured up frogs too, like it was easy.
And the magicians did so with their enchantments, and brought up frogs upon the land of Egypt.
Pharaoh hit up Moses and Aaron, saying, 'Please get God to send these frogs away, and I’ll let your squad go worship.'
Then Pharaoh called for Moses and Aaron, and said, Intreat the LORD, that he may take away the frogs from me, and from my people; and I will let the people go, that they may do sacrifice unto the LORD.
Moses was like, 'When do you want me to ask for you and your crew to chill with the frogs and keep them in the river?'
And Moses said unto Pharaoh, Glory over me: when shall I intreat for thee, and for thy servants, and for thy people, to destroy the frogs from thee and thy houses, {that} they may remain in the river only? {Glory...: or, Have this honour over me, etc} {when: or, against when} {to destroy: Heb. to cut off}
Pharaoh replied, 'Tomorrow.' Moses said, 'Aight, it’ll go down just as you said, so you know there’s truly no one like our God.'
And he said, To morrow. And he said, {Be it} according to thy word: that thou mayest know that {there is} none like unto the LORD our God. {To morrow: or, Against to morrow}
The frogs are peacing out, leaving your crib, your crew, and your peeps; they’re just hanging in the river now.
And the frogs shall depart from thee, and from thy houses, and from thy servants, and from thy people; they shall remain in the river only.
Moses and Aaron bounced from Pharaoh, and Moses was like, 'Yo, God, these frogs got me losing it.'
And Moses and Aaron went out from Pharaoh: and Moses cried unto the LORD because of the frogs which he had brought against Pharaoh.
God came through just as Moses asked; the frogs dipped from the houses, villages, and fields.
And the LORD did according to the word of Moses; and the frogs died out of the houses, out of the villages, and out of the fields.
They piled them up, and it smelled straight up gross.
And they gathered them together upon heaps: and the land stank.
But when Pharaoh saw things were calm, he went full savage and ignored it, just like God warned.
But when Pharaoh saw that there was respite, he hardened his heart, and hearkened not unto them; as the LORD had said.
So God told Moses, 'Yo, tell Aaron to flex his rod and smack the dust to make lice all over Egypt.'
And the LORD said unto Moses, Say unto Aaron, Stretch out thy rod, and smite the dust of the land, that it may become lice throughout all the land of Egypt.
They pulled that off; Aaron waved his rod, and the dust turned into lice everywhere, on people and animals—total chaos.
And they did so; for Aaron stretched out his hand with his rod, and smote the dust of the earth, and it became lice in man, and in beast; all the dust of the land became lice throughout all the land of Egypt.
The magicians tried to match that with their magic, but they flopped hard; lice all over, no cap.
And the magicians did so with their enchantments to bring forth lice, but they could not: so there were lice upon man, and upon beast.
The magicians told Pharaoh, 'This is totally God’s hustle,' but Pharaoh’s heart was still hard, just like God said.
Then the magicians said unto Pharaoh, This {is} the finger of God: and Pharaoh's heart was hardened, and he hearkened not unto them; as the LORD had said.
God told Moses, 'Wake up early and meet Pharaoh by the water; tell him, 'God says, let my people bounce, so they can serve me.''
And the LORD said unto Moses, Rise up early in the morning, and stand before Pharaoh; lo, he cometh forth to the water; and say unto him, Thus saith the LORD, Let my people go, that they may serve me.
If you don’t let my crew dip, I’m sending a whole swarm of flies your way, invading your space and your peeps’ space, and it’s gonna be a fly party in your crib, no cap.
Else, if thou wilt not let my people go, behold, I will send swarms {of flies} upon thee, and upon thy servants, and upon thy people, and into thy houses: and the houses of the Egyptians shall be full of swarms {of flies}, and also the ground whereon they {are}. {swarms...: or, a mixture of noisome beasts, etc}
But I’ll keep the land of Goshen, where my people chill, fly-free, so you know I’m the real deal in this whole earth scenario.
And I will sever in that day the land of Goshen, in which my people dwell, that no swarms {of flies} shall be there; to the end thou mayest know that I {am} the LORD in the midst of the earth.
I’m putting a major split between my crew and yours: tomorrow, you’ll see the proof.
And I will put a division between my people and thy people: to morrow shall this sign be. {a division: Heb. a redemption} {to morrow: or, by to morrow}
And God pulled that off; a gnarly swarm of flies hit Pharaoh’s place, his crew’s spots, and all over Egypt: it was a total mess, fr.
And the LORD did so; and there came a grievous swarm {of flies} into the house of Pharaoh, and {into} his servants' houses, and into all the land of Egypt: the land was corrupted by reason of the swarm {of flies}. {corrupted: or, destroyed}
Pharaoh hit up Moses and Aaron, saying, 'Yo, go sacrifice to your God, but keep it local.'
And Pharaoh called for Moses and for Aaron, and said, Go ye, sacrifice to your God in the land.
Moses was like, 'Nah, we can’t roll like that; we’d be sacrificing the Egyptians’ vibes to our God: they’d totally stone us, no cap.'
And Moses said, It is not meet so to do; for we shall sacrifice the abomination of the Egyptians to the LORD our God: lo, shall we sacrifice the abomination of the Egyptians before their eyes, and will they not stone us?
We’re gonna trek three days into the wild and sacrifice to the Lord as He’s told us to, periodt.
We will go three days' journey into the wilderness, and sacrifice to the LORD our God, as he shall command us.
Pharaoh said, 'Bet, I’ll let you go to sacrifice to your God in the wild, but don’t go too far: pray for me.'
And Pharaoh said, I will let you go, that ye may sacrifice to the LORD your God in the wilderness; only ye shall not go very far away: intreat for me.
Moses said, 'I’m out, gonna pray to the Lord to make those flies chill from you, your crew, and your peeps tomorrow; but don’t be sus and keep playing games about letting us go.'
And Moses said, Behold, I go out from thee, and I will intreat the LORD that the swarms {of flies} may depart from Pharaoh, from his servants, and from his people, to morrow: but let not Pharaoh deal deceitfully any more in not letting the people go to sacrifice to the LORD.
Moses dipped from Pharaoh and prayed to the Lord.
And Moses went out from Pharaoh, and intreated the LORD.
And the Lord pulled a move just like Moses said; He cleared out all the flies from Pharaoh, his crew, and the squad; not a single one left, fr.
And the LORD did according to the word of Moses; and he removed the swarms {of flies} from Pharaoh, from his servants, and from his people; there remained not one.
But Pharaoh was still being sus and wouldn’t let the people bounce.
And Pharaoh hardened his heart at this time also, neither would he let the people go.