Amos Chapter 7
So, the Lord God flexed on me with some crazy visions; He had grasshoppers popping up while the crops were thriving after the king's harvests.
Thus hath the Lord GOD shewed unto me; and, behold, he formed grasshoppers in the beginning of the shooting up of the latter growth; and, lo, {it was} the latter growth after the king's mowings. {grasshoppers: or, green worms}
Once they were done chowing down on the grass, I was like, "Yo Lord, please forgive! Who's gonna support Jacob? He’s pretty small, no cap."
And it came to pass, {that} when they had made an end of eating the grass of the land, then I said, O Lord GOD, forgive, I beseech thee: by whom shall Jacob arise? for he {is} small. {by...: or, who of (or, for,) Jacob shall stand?}
The Lord responded with, "Nah, I'm straight on that," and switched up His plan, periodt.
The LORD repented for this: It shall not be, saith the LORD.
Then the Lord dropped another vision on me: He was poised to unleash fire, and it totally devoured the deep waters and took a chunk out.
Thus hath the Lord GOD shewed unto me: and, behold, the Lord GOD called to contend by fire, and it devoured the great deep, and did eat up a part.
I was like, "Lord, chill for a sec! Who's gonna support Jacob? He’s kinda little, fr."
Then said I, O Lord GOD, cease, I beseech thee: by whom shall Jacob arise? for he {is} small. {by...: or, who of (or, for,) Jacob shall stand?}
The Lord replied, "Nah, that’s not happening either," for real.
The LORD repented for this: This also shall not be, saith the Lord GOD.
He showed me again: the Lord was perched on a wall holding a plumbline, looking all intense.
Thus he shewed me: and, behold, the Lord stood upon a wall {made} by a plumbline, with a plumbline in his hand.
The Lord asked me, "Amos, what do you peep?" I said, "A plumbline." Then the Lord was like, "Bet, I’m placing a plumbline among my people Israel; I won’t bypass them again."
And the LORD said unto me, Amos, what seest thou? And I said, A plumbline. Then said the Lord, Behold, I will set a plumbline in the midst of my people Israel: I will not again pass by them any more:
The high places for Isaac are about to get wrecked, and Israel's sanctuaries are about to be total ruins; I'm coming for Jeroboam's crib with the sword.
And the high places of Isaac shall be desolate, and the sanctuaries of Israel shall be laid waste; and I will rise against the house of Jeroboam with the sword.
Then Amaziah, the priest, hit up Jeroboam, saying, "Amos is scheming against you in Israel; the land can’t handle his vibes."
Then Amaziah the priest of Bethel sent to Jeroboam king of Israel, saying, Amos hath conspired against thee in the midst of the house of Israel: the land is not able to bear all his words.
Amos is saying Jeroboam's gonna get taken out by the sword, and Israel's gonna be dragged away from their own land, no cap.
For thus Amos saith, Jeroboam shall die by the sword, and Israel shall surely be led away captive out of their own land.
Amaziah told Amos, "Yo seer, dip to Judah, grab some food, and prophesy there."
Also Amaziah said unto Amos, O thou seer, go, flee thee away into the land of Judah, and there eat bread, and prophesy there:
"But don’t prophesy at Beth-el again; that’s the king’s spot, and the court’s all about him."
But prophesy not again any more at Bethel: for it {is} the king's chapel, and it {is} the king's court. {chapel: or, sanctuary} {king's court: Heb. house of the kingdom}
Amos shot back, "I ain't no prophet or prophet's kid; I was just a shepherd and picked sycamore fruit."
Then answered Amos, and said to Amaziah, I {was} no prophet, neither {was} I a prophet's son; but I {was} an herdman, and a gatherer of sycomore fruit: {sycomore...: or, wild figs}
The Lord scooped me up while I was chilling with the flock and said, "Go, drop some prophecies to my people Israel."
And the LORD took me as I followed the flock, and the LORD said unto me, Go, prophesy unto my people Israel. {as...: Heb. from behind}
So hear me out: You say, "Don’t prophesy against Israel," and keep your mouth shut about Isaac's house.
Now therefore hear thou the word of the LORD: Thou sayest, Prophesy not against Israel, and drop not {thy word} against the house of Isaac.
The Lord says, "Your wife’s gonna be a harlot in the city, your kids gonna fall by the sword, your land's gonna be divided up; you’ll die in a filthy land, and for sure Israel's gonna be taken away from their land."
Therefore thus saith the LORD; Thy wife shall be an harlot in the city, and thy sons and thy daughters shall fall by the sword, and thy land shall be divided by line; and thou shalt die in a polluted land: and Israel shall surely go into captivity forth of his land.