1 Samuel Chapter 8
So, Samuel aged up, and he appointed his sons to take charge of Israel. Major vibes.
And it came to pass, when Samuel was old, that he made his sons judges over Israel.
His eldest was Joel, with Abiah being the second; they were judging in Beer–sheba, no cap.
Now the name of his firstborn was Joel; and the name of his second, Abiah: {they were} judges in Beersheba.
But his sons weren't as solid, chasing dough, accepting bribes, and messing up the whole judgment game. Savage.
And his sons walked not in his ways, but turned aside after lucre, and took bribes, and perverted judgment.
Then all the elders of Israel rolled up and hit up Samuel in Ramah, like a squad.
Then all the elders of Israel gathered themselves together, and came to Samuel unto Ramah,
They were like, "Yo, you’re getting old, and your sons ain't cutting it. We need a king to judge us, just like all the other nations."
And said unto him, Behold, thou art old, and thy sons walk not in thy ways: now make us a king to judge us like all the nations.
This hit Samuel deep, so he prayed to the Lord, fr.
But the thing displeased Samuel, when they said, Give us a king to judge us. And Samuel prayed unto the LORD. {displeased: Heb. was evil in the eyes of}
The Lord dropped some knowledge on Samuel, saying, "Hear what the people are saying; they ain't dissing you, they’re dissing Me from being their king."
And the LORD said unto Samuel, Hearken unto the voice of the people in all that they say unto thee: for they have not rejected thee, but they have rejected me, that I should not reign over them.
Just like all the times they’ve bounced on Me since I brought them outta Egypt for other gods, they’re doing the same to you.
According to all the works which they have done since the day that I brought them up out of Egypt even unto this day, wherewith they have forsaken me, and served other gods, so do they also unto thee.
So, hear them out, but still lace them with the truth about what a king really means.
Now therefore hearken unto their voice: howbeit yet protest solemnly unto them, and shew them the manner of the king that shall reign over them. {hearken...: or, obey} {howbeit...: or, notwithstanding when thou hast solemnly protested against them then thou shalt}
Samuel spilled all the words from the Lord about their king desires to the people.
And Samuel told all the words of the LORD unto the people that asked of him a king.
He was like, "This is how a king will operate: He'll grab your sons for his chariots and have them run ahead, no cap."
And he said, This will be the manner of the king that shall reign over you: He will take your sons, and appoint {them} for himself, for his chariots, and {to be} his horsemen; and {some} shall run before his chariots.
He'll assign captains over thousands and fifties, making them work the land and gather crops, all to fulfill his war needs.
And he will appoint him captains over thousands, and captains over fifties; and {will set them} to ear his ground, and to reap his harvest, and to make his instruments of war, and instruments of his chariots.
He'll snatch your daughters to be bakers and cooks, fr.
And he will take your daughters {to be} confectionaries, and {to be} cooks, and {to be} bakers.
He'll take your prime fields and vineyards and hand them over to his homies, total sus move.
And he will take your fields, and your vineyards, and your oliveyards, {even} the best {of them}, and give {them} to his servants.
He'll demand a tenth of your crops and vineyards for his crew, straight up.
And he will take the tenth of your seed, and of your vineyards, and give to his officers, and to his servants. {officers: Heb. eunuchs}
He'll enlist your servants and the best young men for his operations, no cap.
And he will take your menservants, and your maidservants, and your goodliest young men, and your asses, and put {them} to his work.
He'll take a tenth of your sheep, and you’ll end up serving him, periodt.
He will take the tenth of your sheep: and ye shall be his servants.
You’ll shout one day because of the king you picked, and the Lord won't even respond then.
And ye shall cry out in that day because of your king which ye shall have chosen you; and the LORD will not hear you in that day.
But the people were like, "Nah, we want a king over us," completely sidelining Samuel.
Nevertheless the people refused to obey the voice of Samuel; and they said, Nay; but we will have a king over us;
They desired to be like all the other nations, having a king to judge and take on their battles, lit.
That we also may be like all the nations; and that our king may judge us, and go out before us, and fight our battles.
Samuel heard it all and relayed it back to the Lord, like a recap.
And Samuel heard all the words of the people, and he rehearsed them in the ears of the LORD.
The Lord said to Samuel, "Give in to them and appoint them a king." Samuel said to the men of Israel, "Alright, head back to your cities."
And the LORD said to Samuel, Hearken unto their voice, and make them a king. And Samuel said unto the men of Israel, Go ye every man unto his city.